One for Yanni

The Monty Python Abusive Voice Keychain. This is Holy Grail style, so the 17 sayings included in this…ahem…elegant little device might not be suitable for granny. OK? £8.99 from next month.

From the legendary Monty Python and the Holy Grail comes this fantastic abusive keychain with 17 sayings from the actual Monty Python crew!! Abusive sayings include: Button your lip, you ratbag! Come on you worm…you miserable little man.

A better way to get rid of annoying telemarketers

Looks like a green saab- Marks Driving?

Do Not Mail and Do Not Call Services

To stop telemarketers contacting you - click on the link and follow the prompts

Pink Pub Crawl

Click the link for details SUNDAY - JUNE 25 - DEPARTING SPORTIES 2PM

Let the buyer beware....

Who Let The Dogs Out

An unusual funeral procession approached the cemetery. A woman with a pitbull terrier was walking behind two hearses. Behind her, another 200 women followed in single file. A passerby was so curious she went up to the woman with the dog and said, "I am very sorry about your loss and I know this is a bad time to disturb you, but I have never seen a funeral like this. Whose is it?" "My late husband's," replied the woman. "My dog attacked him." "So who's in the second hearse?" the passerby inquired. "My mother-in-law," said the woman. "She was trying to help my husband when the pit bull turned on her." A poignant, thoughtful moment passed between the two women before the passerby asked, "Can I borrow the dog?" "Join the queue," said the widow.

Photo Albums

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Brokeback To The Future

Click on it...........if you dare

The Case of the Missing Frypan

A young man called Paul invited his mother for dinner, during the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how handsome Paul's flatmate, Simon, was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this only made her more curious. Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Paul and his flatmate than met the eye. Reading his mums thoughts, Paul volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Simon & I are just flatmates". About a week later, Simon came to Paul saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the frying pan, you don't suppose she took it do you?" "Well I doubt it, but I'll email her just to be sure" said Paul. So he sat down and wrote:DEAR MOTHER, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID" TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID NOT" TAKE THE FRYING PAN, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER. LOVEPAUL Several days later, Paul received an email from his mother which read:DEAR SON, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO" SLEEP WITH SIMON, AND I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO NOT" SLEEP WITH SIMON, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF HE WAS SLEEPING IN HIS OWN BED, HE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE FRYING PAN BY NOW. LOVE MUM MOTTO: NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER SHE ALWAYS, ALWAYS FINDS OUT